The following excerpt below was my morning devotional today. Oh how the Lord knew I needed this! I just told Chris last night through tears and cries of frustrations that I feel like a failure as a mom. I've got great kids--I really do. But man do they push me! I joke that one of these days they are going to push me right over that invisible cliff.
Matthew is now in the fourth grade and while he was straight A's last year, the first six weeks of the year seem to be kicking his little and my bigger hiney. It almost feels like first grade all over again.
And then Mark, with his sheer brilliance can get most of his work done at school. Yet, that makes it real convenient to overlook his assignments. This year there are more projects that he has to complete on his own. Homework due the next day is one thing, but projects that have time lines are another. I don't like to procrastinate. So seeing him wait and wait and wait until I am almost ready to do the project myself drives me CRAZY!
We have soccer for all three, tennis for one, cross country for one, and tutoring for one. We also have church twice a week. Then somewhere in there we are supposed to fit in early bedtimes, hot balanced meals, family mealtimes, chores, showers, and laundry--always laundry. So seeing this devotional this morning is EXACTLY what I needed. It is nice to know I am not alone. And I pray that if you find yourself questioning what God was doing making you a mom that you too would take comfort in these words. If you want to read the devotional in its entirety just click on the link below.
Good Mom?
Bad Mom?
Good Mom?
Bad Mom?
Do you ever feel as though you are the ping-pong ball in a heated match bouncing constantly between feeling like a good mom to a bad mom?
One minute I have a great discussion where my child finally gets it... GOOD MOM!
The next I get an e-mail from a teacher that lists the three parents who have yet to turn in that permission slip and I am on the list for all the world to see... BAD MOM!
I calmly handle the stresses of the morning routine... GOOD MOM!
But then during the afternoon homework session, my child's irresponsibility over a last minute project just about sends me over the edge. I find my neck muscles tensing and my voice rising... BAD MOM!
I make sure they pack something healthy for lunch... GOOD MOM!
The schedule falls apart in the late afternoon and I wind up feeding them sugar cereal for dinner... BAD MOM!
Sometimes I feel like that ping-pong ball mom bouncing from feeling good to bad. Yesterday morning I sat down at the kitchen table after getting everyone where they needed to be and cried. Sometimes having kids is the greatest thing that has ever happened in my life. Other days I feel like the task of parenting little people is driving me to the brink of craziness. Just the other day I was processing some recent family things with my friend, Renee, over the phone. Suddenly a strange theme seemed to arise. I just started laughing.
I told Renee that so many of my days seemed to tell the same kind of story... I was on the verge of a breakdown and then I spent time with Jesus and He made things better. Renee quipped back to me, "Well, isn't that where most of us live every day?" Not that we are on the edge of a breakdown, but we live in a place of utter dependence on God. I know as a mom, I live in constant need of His love, encouragement, wisdom, perspective, strength, patience, and grace.
Anything I do right as a mom is because of my constant dialogs with God. Anything I do wrong as a mom is because of trying to do things in my own strength and slap wearing myself out. That's where grace steps in. And I need lots of grace. God's grace steps in and says, "Lysa, you are doing better than you think. Stop bouncing from feeling good to bad to good to bad. In the good times, rejoice and thank me. In the not so good times, call out to me quickly."
And suddenly it occurred to me; with God I'm never a bad mom. I might be having a bad moment... or two... or seventeen. But a few bad moments do not define me as a bad mom. God's grace is there to cover me. Teach me. And even in the middle of a bad moment, interrupt me, redirect me, and change me. Forgiveness is there. Love is there. A second chance is there.
You are a good mom my friend even if, like me, you've had a few bad moments... you is the exact mom God knew your children needed. Let's live in that truth today.
"Dear Lord, being a mom is a great privilege but one that can be so challenging at times. Teach me how to lean on You with every action and every reaction. And when I mess up, please help me to not define myself by my mommy failures. Help me to only be defined by Your love that assures me and Your grace that covers me. In Jesus' Name, Amen." copyright Lysa TerKeurst
1 comment:
Elaine, you don't see it, but the rest of us know that you are an amazing mom! You hold your family together beautifully. I can only imagine how challenging being a mom is, but God has given you the grace to do that job so well.
I hope that one day I can follow your example of mothering. I don't know a better mom, honestly! When I think to the future and what I want to be for my children, I think about what I have learned from you.
So when your world is falling down around you, know that you inspire me and I only see grace, patience, and love for your family! God shines through you!
Post a Comment