I'm Healed

Today I had an appointment at the podiatrist. About six months ago I went in and he removed an embedded toe nail from my left toe. Basically what had happened was that my toe got stepped on enough that it caused the nail to be pushed into my skin (kind of like an ingrown toenail) but then in order for my toe to protect itself it started growing skin over the nail. Had I not gotten it removed the nail would have eventually grown through the tip of my toe. So he had to go in a cut out the nail. It was quite painful. But he killed the nail root and it feels SOOO much better--that portion of my nail will never grow back. I asked him why this is happening to me now and he said that constant damage to your toe can cause it. He sees a lot of teachers who get their toes stepped on by kiddos. He also sees ballet dancers and soccer players and ice skaters who constantly squeeze their feet into narrow shoes. Well, this weekend my RIGHT toe started hurting and was so painful I could not even apply pressure to the brake too hard due to the pain. And working in the nursery yesterday was oh so much fun. Every time one of those precious gifts from God came too close to my foot I almost screamed STOP! So I just knew that today he would have to also perform another surgery. Luckily, it was simply a case of removing the infected nail. He did say that should I begin experiencing problems within the next 3-4 months that I need to go back in and have the surgery at the first sign of pain. I said "really, when it is just starting to become tender?" He said "well yeah because either you will dig at it until you get it causing damage along the way or you will wait until it is causing you this much pain. So it is easier to remove at the first sign tenderness." Hmmmm...one of my moments again. Isn't that like my walk with God? I allow something so small to fester until it literally cripples me, whether it be resentment, laziness, unforgiveness, or on and on. I could walk with the Lord much more freely if I simply let him remove the infection at the first sign. How can I go before the Lord in true worship when I am like the man waiting at the pool. I am so crippled from my disease of (fill in the blank) that I can't get up to worship. It has weighed heavy on me today--especially since my day yesterday was less than stellar. It seems that Sundays are the hardest days for me. Since most of my Sundays are spent serving others by working in the nurseries, it seems as though everything that can go wrong will--be it with my family or others. And sometimes I carry that infection with me, instead of letting it go--instead of trusting God to resolve it. I have so far to go in order to be more like Him. I was so glad that the Dr was able to remove the problem both times. And I am so grateful that the Lord will remove the infection every time. But just like my foot, I wait until I have made such a mess of things that the healing process takes even longer. Transform me Lord, Renew me. Remove my SELF from me that I may pour out your healing truth. And when the infection comes, urge me to clean it out completely so I may be whole.